Why Can’t We Take Our Own Advice?

Human beings, in general, are smart but when it comes to matters of the heart, we might as well throw any sense of rationality right out the window. We give those closest to us the absolute best advice, coming up with mature, well-worded guidance but when we eventually find ourselves in those same shoes, anything we ever said might as well be shot to hell.

It usually happens when you’re involved with someone who isn’t giving you all you deserve. Ultimately, you might cry a lot or spend your days wondering where your relationship is heading (most likely in the wrong direction). It’s always tough because your mind KNOWS the answers, you know what SHOULD be done, but you just can’t bring yourself to do it. Most of the time, the thing you need to do is walk away.

But walking away and leaving behind a relationship you’ve worked so hard to build is no easy feat. Leaving a person you really care about, maybe even love, is never simple. It will probably take a few tries to get it right but in the end you need to know it’s the right thing to do if you aren’t being treated the way you know you should be. If your gut is telling you it’s time to move on, your gut is not lying.

We stay stuck is situations that we never thought we’d be in because we fall victim to the games, the back and forth, the rollercoaster rides we can’t get off. But it’s really not fair that you’re being kept on the ride when you’ve continually tried to get off and make something more of it, make it better. Whether it’s a relationship you’ve been in for years or someone who just won’t commit to you at all, you need to know that you deserve more than mind games and the unknown. You deserve to be loved and treated well, treated fair, treated nicely.

You already know this though. You’ve heard it all before and you even tell it to yourself almost daily. But somewhere along the way, the lines get blurred and it’s as if our brains say one thing and our disagreeing hearts, knowing it’s wrong, do the complete opposite. We frustrate ourselves because we know what to do, but we just can’t heed our own counsel.

So why can’t we take our own advice? It’s ‘cause we’re scared. Scared of the unknown. Scared to do the right thing but regret it later. We don’t want to miss out and we don’t want to lose what we have, even though we know it might be for the best. We know we deserve more but that doesn’t make walking away easier. We don’t want to turn our backs on that one person who we think knows us best. We know we will cry and we don’t want to lose the only person who we want there to dry our tears.

One day, you’ll do it though. You’ll listen to your brain over your heart and you will know you’re doing the right thing. It might be hard and every muscle in your body might want to turn back, but the moment you take your own advice, you’ll feel stronger. You will feel empowered. You might regret it too and you might even feel like shit, but eventually you will know you did the right thing. You’ll know your worth and you’ll be stronger for the next time around. Just remember that everyone will be giving you advice for your whole life, but in the end the most important opinion is your own. Don’t let it go unnoticed.

Took my own advice years ago and ended up happy,

The Love Hawk

Shannon loves love. She has a passion for people and understanding the little things that make everyone unique and similar, all at the same time. She has degrees in Communication Studies, Psychology, and Broadcast Journalism but it’s the school of life that taught Shannon most of what she knows about love and relationships.

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