Conversations for These Times

In Charles Dickens’ novel, A Tale of Two Cities, the story opens with, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, …

As I re-read these words, I cannot help but think that Charles Dickens was writing about the times we are currently living in rather than the era of French Revolution. I wonder if he understood that the words, published in 1859, would resonate almost two hundred years later.

Why re-visit these words, you might ask. Fair enough. The idea that these times are the best or the wort is to a large degree personal choice, where we give our focus and energy. Even Dickens highlights wisdom and belief as possibilities. To say the least, current events are de-stabilizing. As a result, it is incumbent upon each of us to make choices regarding where we invest our energy and attention.

We live in a world of frequencies. Despite what politicians and pundits may say, the future is not fixed. Every thought, emotion, and action we choose carries a vibrational signature, a signature which influences our personal experience and the world we inhabit. This means making mindful choices, moment by moment, day by day.

Love versus Fear

My ‘go to’ strategy when experiencing challenging times is to ask myself, “how can I elevate love?’ The question was raised in a lecture I attended several years ago given by Marianne Williamson. Author of the book “Return to Love’, a read that has frequently guided me through troubled waters, a member of the audience asked her, ‘how to we conquer fear?’ What a question.

Marianne is amazing to listen to as she is so clear and what she shared that evening has resonated with me ever since. To paraphrase she shared that FEAR is LOUD; when it is spoken it is with conviction. It is designed to unsettle and to ruffle feathers, a precursor to control.

Unfortunately, love is soft. It is grace, kindness, compassion and all of the many things we attribute to loving energy. As a result, it gets less attention. That means that we have to give it legs; we need to practice love in our life: love of self, love of others, living in love. Yes, this is a challenge and as I see it, LOVE is our salvation not FEAR.

We start with Self-Love. With this in mind I share one of the best-known quotes from Marianne, as a reminder that we, you and I, are enough and that to live our LIGHT, to emanate self-love, is how we gift it to others and elevate love in the world.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure
around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Marianne Williamson

Heart versus Head

I am not sure about you, but I find myself in my head a lot these days, even though I understand that this is where fear is fanned. My head leads me into many rabbit holes. The solution is to identify a strategy to manage our minds, for it tends to focus on what’s not right. You get caught up in your problems, and you lose sight of areas in your life that are good. If you are not careful the results are harmful to you, your mood. You perpetuate FEAR, you become victimized.

Overthinking everything shuts off access to your heart intelligence, intelligence which is built upon wisdom and experience, appreciation, care, compassion, nonjudgment, and forgiveness. As the author of HeartMath, Doc Childre suggests, “When we’re engaged with our hearts, the mind slows down and our thoughts become more rational and focused”.

HeartMath is a very large topic and I encourage you to explore it in depth. Primarily the science explains that our hearts also contain decision making neurons, equivalent to those of brain cells. Heart intelligence or wisdom, when engaged in a way that is coherent with our brain smarts, brings balance to our lives, our decision making and our health. “By getting your head and heart in coherence and allowing heart intelligence to work for you, you have a realistic chance of transforming your anger/fear in a healthy way.”( Doc Childre)

“Without love, knowledge is empty,
and wisdom, no matter how vast,
is lifeless if not rooted in the heart.”

Hope versus Despair

As I read an article a few days ago by another of my favorite authors Parker Palmer, I was reminded that a travelling companion of fear is despair. As Love is to Fear, Hope is to Despair. In his words, Parker Palmer wrote the following:

What is hope, and where does it come from? For me, hope is not the result of calculating the odds, of “positive thinking,” or of any kind of philosophical or theological gymnastics…
Hope is a life-force deep in the root system of nature itself, including human nature.
It’s a power that precedes thinking or believing, that keeps us putting one foot in front of the other when we can’t see where we’re going or even believe there’s someplace to go.
Hope is an instinctive “NO!” to everything that threatens life,
and “YES!” to everything that sustains life, even when our minds are saying, “All is lost.”

Palmer goes on to share the importance of staying close to nature, and to your own creaturely instincts. As he shares, “It’s a cold, hard winter out there, but underneath the ice and snow, nature is preparing for an uprising”, a reminder that for each of us, there is work to be done “for and with your family and friends, your community, your country, your soul.”

As I opened with, it is the best of times and the worst of times. Hope asks us to turn our focus to the best of times and to envision a future which sustains and grows life as we wish it to be. Share your love, your wisdom and your hope liberally.

Mindful versus Mindless

Finally, it is a time for mindful choices. As Elaine Smookler points out, “To practice mindfulness is to make a deal with yourself to love and care for the one known as you. You can begin by making a commitment to yourself to notice the small things that help you shine, and be aware of the thoughts and situations that seem to steal away your light.”

And following this commitment to yourself, make a commitment to your community, your country, your friends and your family.

Final Word:

Love, Wisdom- Inner Knowing, and Hope: Braid these together mindfully and let them be the fabric of your life. This is your pathway to health and resilience, one which I hope all of us embrace.

 Elevate love, raise it up
 Tap into your wisdom, your inner knowing, your heart intelligence
 Cultivate hope, envision the future.

Until Next Time,

Betty Healey