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The Seeker Newspaper Cornwall
Home Community Columnists

Garbo

Editorial Board by Editorial Board
May 23, 2018
in Columnists
Reading Time: 7min read
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Sue could sleep through a war. Lightening storms, smashing garbage can lids in the middle of the night, squealing brakes on a dirt road that would be the end to any number of old biddies, but are just a pillow toss for my number one fan.

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I on the other hand am a jittery sort and have spent the majority of my life playing the diva, wallowing away the days-sleeping under elephant hostas amid hundreds of ferns growing on the south side of the house.

If you ask me, Sue and I get along pretty well except when I’m hungry which is all the time now. We can’t see eye to eye on anything, even when I raise a fuss when it comes to how much or how little she feeds me. Why won’t she take the advice of other owners and spend a little more on me and less on herself, because by the looks of Sue’s waistline it’s not hard to figure out whose eating for two. Food is my life right now but there’s been no snack or treats in over a week, since she started talking with that boyfriend of hers. I mean what’s summer if not for the sounds of tree frogs trilling from high above, or the long quiet evenings when everything settles down…bringing the smells of bar-b-q, potato salad, creepy crawlies and freshly mowed lawns.

Once in a while the dog down the street barks and scares the crap out of me and I wonder if we’ll ever be friends like the other cats I see him with around here? I’ll have to go pay him a visit the next time I’m out in case he knows anybody else with a good master who actually FEEDS their animals! One day they’ll open the paper and see my face on a milk carton, but wait I must be HALT (hungry, angry, lonely and tired), because everything’s upsetting me today. It’s not every day a lady like me gets herself pregnant with triplets, so that’s got to count for something. Last night through the window I overheard the guy across the road tell Sue that he’ll take one of the babies once they’re weaned. He said it was a ‘sure-feit’ for him and his wife and you know I couldn’t be happier and actually slept through the night for the first time in weeks.

There’s been a lot of rain lately and I’ve had to stay indoors looking at the yard from behind half open lids. The world is going on without me to keep it in line and I kind of wonder what they’re going to do when I leave this place, but that’s a silly thought because there’s always more where I came from. One thing I’ve yet to regret was moving in from the country with its wild animals trying to kill me every day, tractors moving up and down corn fields or those damn hen houses with everyone squabbling for their grit.

I long for the early days when everything was bountiful and people gathered with their happy smiles as folk stopped to talk whenever I’d pass by. Music played on transistors, kids ran the yards and life was simple and that’s when I remember Sue…standing at the back door in her housecoat squinting into the distance like she couldn’t believe her eyes.

Yup, the day we met was the luckiest day of her life because where else would she get a guard dog, pest controller, mouser, house sitter and star personality like me for under $200! I tell you it sure feels good to get that off my chest and clear the air.

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The Seeker Newspaper is located at 327 Second Street E., Cornwall, ON K6H 1Y8 -- All rights reserved
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