Doug Ford’s Report Card

No TV for the next month, Doug!

A political opportunist, Doug Ford, is hedging his bets by calling for an unnecessary and expensive snap election next week. He’s chosen well – he plans to bamboozle an exhausted electorate amid the turmoil of Trump’s first weeks, Trudeau’s resignation and the Liberal search for a new leader. The reason? He needs a “mandate” to fight Trump’s terrible tariffs. But does he? The last I heard, it was the federal government that negotiated international trade in this country – not renegade provinces.

Before we drag ourselves to the election booths, we should take what little time we have left to grade Doug’s performance as our premier. His report card, if you will.

In my opinion, Doug Ford gets a resounding F, and here’s why:

The Greenbelt land grab

Despite repeated public promises (on TV!) to leave this environmentally sensitive area alone, Doug Ford hoped we wouldn’t notice when he opened Greenbelt for development to his wealthy developer buddies. We noticed. The widespread outrage and a negative report from the Auditor General have forced Doug to reverse his decision (for now).

Healthcare highjacking

Doug promised he would end “hallway medicine”. Privatization would save us all. After years of “getting it done,” I am seeing increased ER closures, staff shortages, and longer wait times in the ER. Doug promised you wouldn’t have to use your credit card to pay for a doctor. What he didn’t tell you is that the closest thing to a doctor in many towns is a vet. Woof woof for Doug.

Education – the boulevard of broken dreams

Book learning is pretty important. Without it, your kid is destined to be the janitor. Perfectly good job for some, but could your kid do better? Ford’s government has generously given Ontario schools budget cuts,  increased class sizes and e-learning. Given how little he values education, you’d think Doug never went to school!

COVID-19 – it’s only a cold

I liked his cheesecake recipe, but Doug’s covid response was a recipe for disaster: mixed messaging, delayed lockdowns, and inadequate support for frontline workers. Unwilling to be dictated to by so-called experts, Doug’s government ignored expert advice, leading to unnecessary suffering and economic hardship.

Mr. “I’ll make you a deal“

Cronyism is Doug Ford’s no-fail business approach. If you attended his daughter’s wedding and gave big presents, there’s a good chance he’ll appoint you to a key position or pull a lucrative contract out of the hat for ya! The Ontario Place redevelopment and using the Minister’s Zoning Orders (MZO) to fast-track developments point to a tiny lack of transparency and integrity. Mmm.

The cost of living crisis: it costs to live

My favourite lettuce two-pack went up a buck 2 months ago and another buck this week. I wear fleece-lined clothes indoors, and my mortgage interest rates doubled this year. As a true capitalist hero, Ford is delighted that the grocery store is rolling in dough, the utility company is lighting up its profit, and the banks are laughing all the way to… well, themselves. He helped the Landlord and Tenant Board make it easier for landlords to evict their tenants and harder for tenants to challenge rental increases. If your rent doubles, thank Doug.

Tarmac black is the new green

Doug Ford thinks trees and clean air are overrated unless they’re in Muskoka, where pretty trees equal a good investment. Treating Ontario’s environment like a suggestion and not a responsibility, Doug saw fit to remove the cap & trade system, reduce the Endangered Species Act, limit conservation authorities’ power, remove land from the Greenbelt and repeal the Toxics Reduction Act – to name a few.

Municipal affairs – not a love story

Though he vowed to stay out of it, Doug just couldn’t help himself – he interfered with municipal affairs by slashing the Toronto City Council and overwriting their local planning decisions. They like him so much that they’re thinking of naming the main bathroom ‘Doug’s Privy Council’—a loving tribute to a leader so full of… ideas. With Bill 23 (More Homes Built Faster Act), Doug also reduced the power of conservation authorities while shifting provincial responsibility for environmental considerations onto municipalities – like ours – who can’t afford it. I hope you like sandbag parties because our disaster response will be a BYOS affair (bring-your-own-shovel) the next time it floods.

Fighting criticism – literally

While some would describe Ford as a hard man, he does have a sensitive side – when dealing with criticism. Offense is the best defence, they say, and Doug understands this. When the Ontario Nurses Association criticized his policies on healthcare privatization and working conditions, he sued them. When advocacy groups oppose his policies, he reduces their funding. If you don’t like what the Ford government does – he’s made it harder (if not impossible) to sue the government. ETC.

Transit – a road to nowhere

A likely fan of Tonka toys and electric racetracks as a kid, Doug likes roads and things that go vroom! Car drivers “kiss” Doug’s ring. And why wouldn’t they? He scrapped car registration fees. Who cares if they were a source of money for things like healthcare? He’s happy to pay $48 Million to remove bike lanes on three streets in Toronto because, hey.. they cause congestion! (they don’t). Why invest in better public transit when you can just drive yourself? Highway 413 and the Bradford Bypass will give you the opportunity to enjoy the scenic view… while it lasts. And that’s not all. Now Doug is “thinking” of dropping a measly 50-60 Billion to build a 50 km tunnel under metropolitan Toronto to ease congestion. Imagine sitting in a 50 km concrete tube in rush hour. Where’s my Xanax?

It’s enough to drive one to drink!

And that’s just fine! One could almost call Doug Ford prescient when he expanded alcohol availability in Ontario….