One Small Act

As I entered the hospital entry, I scoured the signs looking for registration. It is early Monday morning, and like me, it feels like the world is awakening one cell at a time, stretching, yawning and rubbing ourselves into wakefulness. I see registration straight ahead, choose door number one.

The receptionist sits behind the glass partition, in darkness, rubbing her shoulders. The day has not yet begun and she has a tight neck. I ask if she is open for business. She nods. I sit, dig out my healthcare care and slide it over to her. The drill is familiar to both of us but for her will be repeated hundreds of times over the upcoming days. She makes a few corrections in my contact information, returns my card, then gives me directions to my appointment.

I pause for a moment then pull a box of attractionCARDS from my purse and offer one to her. She looks surprised, a little tentative, then reaches into the box.

“I needed this today” she says then she shows me the card; ‘I schedule ME FIRST time everyday.”

“I saw you rubbing your shoulders. Sounds like the perfect message. Maybe you need a massage. Women are not very good at looking after themselves”, I add.

She studies the card then offers, “you know, there are no such thing as coincidences.”

“I know”, I respond, “that’s why we call these attractionCARDS”.

I stand and head off for my appointment, and as I leave, I know this simple act has had an impact. She placed the card on her monitor and it will remind her throughout her day of our interaction, more importantly the message.

And for me the day is only beginning.

I head to my appointment where I meet Isabelle. We chat while she prepares me for the Echocardiogram. The procedure goes smoothly. She is obviously competent. Just before I leave, I offer her a card. She chooses ‘I hold myself in high regard’. She nods then says quietly, “not all the time.”

“Well Isabelle, you are very good at your job. Polite. You explained things well. I appreciate it. Have a great day.” As I walk away, I hear her sharing the message with a colleague.

Back at the hotel, where we stayed the previous night, we check out. Adam is on the desk. As we tidy up the bill Jim offers him a card. He chooses, “I express gratitude daily for the abundance in my life.” Jim and Adam have a conversation about the importance of gratitude. As we leave the hotel, you can see that the conversation lit him up.

One Small Act

The interactions described above are a normal part of our day. We typically offer attractionCARDS where ever we go: restaurants, doctor’s office, stores, airports, every time we are interacting with others. I have had some friends suggest that this is corny. Maybe. But we see how this one small act makes a difference, how it leads to meaningful exchanges with others and yes, how it lifts people up. I cannot tell you haw many times someone has said, “you just made my day.” I believe this happens because typically people no longer take the time to interact with others in a meaningful way. We are too busy, on a tight schedule, or on our phones while we pay for something.

Offering a card, a message, is a simple non-invasive way of expressing appreciation for something someone has just done for you, even when this is their job. In a study completed by the Gallup organization many years ago, called ‘How Full is Your Bucket’, Gallup surveyed workers and asked “What is the most important ingredient missing from your workplace?’

You might think the answer would be related to money or leadership or any number of possible responses but overwhelmingly employees reported that they did not feel appreciated, either from their superiors, colleagues or customers. Isn’t that sad, especially when saying thank you, or that you appreciate their service or contribution is such an easy and inexpensive act.

Every interaction is an opportunity. Consider how many people you speak with on a daily basis: neighbours, friends, customers, work colleagues, service people, the list goes on. Now imagine if you simply took the time to offer a kind word, a thank you, an I appreciate you for…; what a world we can co-create.

attractionCARDS

Jim and I created attractionCARDS about 20 years ago. They were actually the brainchild of one of our clients who noticed that we often handed out message cards during our workshops and programs. At the time we sourced these cards elsewhere. Messages always began with something like: ‘You are making a difference in people’s lives’ or ‘Treat yourself with gentleness’. Both good messages. Our client pointed out however, that in our teaching we stressed the importance of the ‘I voice’ which would rephrase these same messages as ‘I am making a difference in people’s lives ‘ or ‘I treat myself with gentleness.’

The brain is a funny thing. You could say both sets of messages mean the same thing, and essentially, they do but not when they register in your psyche. You simply do not have to buy in when you replaces I. Read both sets of messages for yourself and you will notice how they differ.
On the advice of our colleague, Jim and I proceeded to create our own set of messages, affirmations, 88 attractive messages in a box. As we tested them out, (yes, workshop participants were occasionally test subjects), we received amazing feedback. They went into print and have been part of our daily practice and our work ever since.

Final Word – Upon retirement, I admittedly struggled with my identity, wondering what my sense of purpose will be now that work was not the driving force in my life. In conversation with many of my colleagues we decided that retirement is simply a re-definition of self, one where instead of doing, designing and delivering workshops and coaching teams, it was an invitation to BE, to BE on purpose rather than to DO my purpose.

You might think that is easy. In many ways it is and it also requires a level of mindfulness that is different from being the teacher/facilitator/coach. It means really embracing my values and living on purpose in a way that changes how I greet others, how I am present to people, how I interact. attractionCARDS have facilitated this. The moment I open the box and offer a message to someone, the energy shifts. More often than not, unexpected conversations erupt and a different type of connection is forged.

One small act! It changes everything.

Until next time, Betty Healey