Let’s face it, everyone loves love. When you’ve found that special person who you adore and want to spend the rest of your life with, it truly is the best thing in the world. However, finding that person is just the start- if you want to keep them, and stay happy and strong as a couple then you’ll need to put in the work. Two people living as a couple while also leading their individual lives can be a complex situation that requires adaptability and balance. It can be upsetting and difficult when you start to drift apart and lose the spark you once had, so being aware that this can happen is important. That way you can prevent it from happening, or take steps to fix the situation if it’s already started to happen. Here are three reasons couples tend to drift apart.
Not Spending Enough Time Quality Together
One of the main ways couples grow apart is simply because they don’t spend enough time together. More specifically, they don’t spend quality time. When you live together it’s easy to fall into a routine where you each do your own thing when you’re at home together. Perhaps you both scroll your phones, or one person spends all evening gaming while the other watches tv. You might be in the same room, but there’s no real connection and it can lead to a situation where you feel more like housemates than partners. We all lead busy lives, and after work there’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend some time alone to decompress, but do make quality time for your partner too. Small things can make a big difference, maybe commit one night a week where you watch a show together without your phones as distractions. Planning dates is another way to get that quality time in, it can be as inexpensive or elaborate as you’d like. The important thing is you invest that time to stay connected and keep the spark alive.
A Lack of Affection
Affection in relationships is so important. It’s the affection and intimacy that makes you partners rather than just friends, so it’s important to show this to your partner. Not everyone shows affection in the same way, some people hate public displays of affection whereas for others, holding hands and being this way in public is important. Taking the time to understand your partner and their needs is crucial, and if there are differences between the ways you both show affection it’s important to reach compromises so that you each feel happy and fulfilled.
Things Getting Boring in the Bedroom
There’s more to being a strong couple than what goes on in the bedroom, but there’s no doubt that this is important. When things are taking a downward turn in the relationship, it’s the physical intimacy that tends to suffer- so it can often be a good indication of how well things are going overall. Many couples struggle with time and practicality meaning they can’t just jump into bed as often as they’d like, however there are other factors involved too. To stay sexual in a relationship, many people need to feel close and intimate with their partner first, so if that goes then so will the sex side of things. Lay the foundations, work on rebuilding that intimacy with romance, massage and caring gestures. Talk to your partner to regain that closeness, rediscover what it is that they want and desire. If you’re struggling with the physical side of things, certain medications can lead to having better sex with your partner. Improving your physical health will rebalance your hormones too, which can boost sex drive if that’s what has been holding you back.
What do you think are the best ways to rekindle a spark in a relationship?