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Regarding alligators

Lisa Gray by Lisa Gray
September 25, 2025
in Wondrous Life
Reading Time: 4 mins read
0

“See you later alligator. . . In a while crocodile”

In the late 50s, a husband and wife invited an Indian couple to share a meal at their home in Rosedale Terrace. Taking it all in, their eldest son viewed the experience with curious perspective.

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For the visitors sitting across the table, Canada became known as a welcoming and peaceful country. Using their own lives and authenticity as example, Angus and Jean (nee Cryderman) McDonald were about to change the world.

As a young man growing up in Harrisons Corners, Angus McDonald travelled out west when he turned 18 to train with the RAF during WWII. Just as the war was ending overseas, he received a ticket home that included an education to McGill University paid for through the Canadian Veterans Charter Program for returning servicemen.

An engineer at Howard Smith, Angus never got upset: he worked through it. An integral part of his identity was the philosophy that if someone was different or interesting, they were worth his time. He loved sports and coached youth broomball and hockey for many years.

Angus met his wife Jean (Cryderman) at a party. Born and raised in Osnabruck Centre, Jean was very family oriented. Her own mother was a hockey and wrestling fan- which was a big thing for the times. Holding interests on a variety of topics through her 94 years, Jean’s personal joys were time spent with her grandchildren, and having everyone over at Christmas. Her favourite expression regarding alligators lives in infamy.

For Terry McDonald, there was nothing that went unnoticed in his world. A quiet kid, he spent much of his childhood playing at the neighbouring Alguire farm, picking strawberries or looking after a bull in Apple Hill. Like his dad, he was heavy into sport. From grade 3 up until high school, Angus coached Terry in hockey, and lacrosse. At this time, Terry also played for two area hockey teams.

Wanting a career in Physical Education, Terry opted for McMaster in Hamilton as their CAPE program combining Arts & Physical Education, allowed students to take Phys Ed in their first year. Choosing Psychology as his second major, Terry felt much like the Indian couple sitting in his parent’s living room, seeing their new world for the first time.

After Terry graduated university, he learned that a physician friend was opening a summer program. The goal of helping children under the age of 13 living at home, learn to deal with their emotions and mental health concerns, spoke to Terry. After working two summers there, Terry switched his career to Corrections Services.

Working at The John Howard Society, Terry served as a group facilitator for youth. Pulling from his own life experience and calm demeanor, the kids liked being with Terry because they felt less threatened. The program’s goal of getting kids to talk about their feelings helped the most in alleviating stress and anxiety for participants.

In rooms of a dozen people, Terry supervised young offenders on probation. Over time, he sees some of the positive after a year.
Many people underrate identifying with kids, whereas Terry showing their strengths in the simplest movement of sitting next to them quietly- was the biggest influence.

In 1984, Terry took a job at the Ontario Probation and Parole Services in Cornwall. Some adults with anger issues, spousal abuse problems or those with sexual disorders could regulate their emotions in the group activity circle.

Terry seems to have no weak points. Later in his career, he taught others. First as a college professor at St. Lawrence College in Kingston for a year and then trained other probation officers to operate special groups.

Terry feels, if you stay calm, the other person will stay calm. A valuable change on the horizon arrived when an outsider would see the major changes in criminals if Terry was in the room.

In Angus’ non-judgmental way: let’s get bored with a safe person.

As a way of getting back to nature and his roots, Terry got into hobby farming. Organized, solid and enduring, Terry’s work with Canada’s youth is especially strong in places like The Lancer Centre in Ingleside.

Seeking variety, he joined a book club and got into creative writing, but Terry’s real passion coaching youth basketball in Cornwall, Russell and Prescott continues to this day.

With no real focus on scoring or individual prowess, kids are free to be themselves and just play. Call it altruism or inclusivity, another Canadian birthright is born.

Copyright © July 2025

Lisa Gray

Lisa Gray

Lisa is a member of the Cornwall Writer Society, a group that meets at the Cornwall Public Library on the 3rd Monday of each month from 6:15 to 8:15 pm. For more information about this or any program at the library, please call 613-932-4796. To reach Lisa, email [email protected].

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